Or rather the need to be frugal. It never went away just things got easier for a while. However, neither child received a birthday present this year so I'm determined they will get something worthwhile at Christmas, and we will have our first grandchild mid December This means we have to put aside now. Not so easy on a hand to mouth existance which will be the state for some time to come I fear as we pay off the debts incurred by a failing business, thankfully we both now have regular incomes. Tonights supper is homemade veg soup with a large amount of homegrown tomatoes in it & homemeade bread with the last of the bread flour. Not sure if I will have enough money next week to buy more but no doubt we will survive.
I picked up a book being thrown away by the library at work this morning. "Your Best Life Now" by Joel Osteen, published 2004. The title intrigued me, I am a fairly positive & optimistic person as a rule, only inclined to the occasional bout of self pity, the anorak less so & sometimes it's hard to cope with. The book is based on belief in God & His ability to provide. I am not a religious person particularly, I was brought up Church of England, taught in Sunday School for a while even, have been confirmed, married in church & if we'd had the money would have had my second marriage blessed in church. My 90 year old Mum is a firm believer still & so was my beloved Dad. Yet I can't bring myself to attend church on a regular basis. I do believe, however, that to be a Christian is to treat others as you would wish to be treated yourself, whatever / whoever you may be involved with. With respect & dignity. And that's good enough for me. I digress. I think that the bottom line is to have self belief & to me that is what the book is about. I also believe in fate & I think this book was meant to fall into my hands & remind me to be positive. I'm not sure how much I can influence my much loved anorak but maybe he'll pick up the book & read the back cover & seeds may be sown in his mind.